Jinchuriki Stay nightKALEID LINER PRISMA ILLYA
by L33t Horo
Summary: Naruto working for Zelt 's for recovering something in an alternate universe were no grail war existed, watch as Naruto completly messes up both Rin and Luviagelita and pals with both Ruby and Saphire Kaleido sticks!
1. Chapter 1

Jinchuriki Stay night/KALEID LINER PRISMA ILLYA

A Totally wacked out AU of the FSN universe

settings are the same as the original the only difference is this is an alternate universe and servants do not exist, there is no Grail or has not been created.

**First person Point of view**

"You know... I never expected this... yeah the old man asked me for a favor after the war was done with but I never thought he would mean it this way... now I got no way out until the old bastard allows me to go home... my ability with the second magic are fried due to his interference, fortunately I still got my other only ORIGNAL magic and my old "skill set", I find this quiet boring as there is no one to fight, I still wonder why he asked me to come here and trap me here... if I am gone for too long **THEY**will kill me for sure..."

The person shivers in fright as he feels a wave of coldness wash over him.

**End of first person point of view**

We see his lower part of his face and 6 whiskers like marks adorn his face, he grins.

"Well there is nothing to do then... so I better jump" he said as he grinned and let himself fall from the skyscraper he was standing.

He twisted himself as he looked to the dark sky and extended his hand, then the other.

"Kage bunshin no jutsu!" he said as 2 clones were created and spring-launched him to another building where he landed with the grace and elegance of a cat.

He then ran and jumped again and landed in the light pole as he viewed the city.

Time to blend in he said with a sight as he pulled his high school uniform.

"I just hope Zeltch-ojisan didn't send anyone troublesome before me" Naruto prayed.

**At that time in the city of Fuyuki international Airport**

A girl with long black stockings, a black mini skirt and a red blouse walks out of the airport terminal with a bag and something that looks like a wand.

"Well, well. I didn't think I'd be forced to return in just a year" the girl said.

A stick popped out of her suitcase, it looked like the wand from card captors Sakura.

"Finally returning home after such a long time... it's a good feelings master?" the stick said.

"Even traveling separately you still managed to pass trough customs quiet well" said another voice.

Another girl with a long bluish dress reminiscing of the Victorian era walks by and catches up with the first girl

"A gloomy country... its lack of elegance matches yours doesn't it?" the other girl said.

"Correction" said the first girl "This feeling is the worst, Ruby. Returning with such as person makes me feel like vomiting"

*clench *

The two girls then locked each others hands and started to fight.

"IAM THE ONE WHO FEELS LIKE TROWING UP! FOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO COME FROM YOU...!" the second girl shouted

"YOU THINK YOURSELF RATHER HIGHLY YOU STUCK UP PRISSY!" The first one yelled

Two wands popped up one from the first girl's bag and the other from the other one asking their masters to stop, to remind them of their mission.

The two girl's identity is now shown, the first one was Rin Tohsaka and the second one was Luviagelita Edelfelt and they just arrived fresh from the clock tower in London.

"Master said that we would have some help from someone he trusts" Rin said.

"True he did said that... but he also said "Do not rely on him... he can be quiet... finicky"" Luvia said trying her best to imitate Zelt's voice.

"Do you know that new help we been sent Ruby?" Rin asked Ruby, the magical stick.

"I am sorry master, but lord Zeltch didn't give us much info...he only said "he is a complete and utter idiot but he is rather strong, do not underestimate him" is what he said" Ruby said.

**Back with the whiskered person**

The person sighed as he entered high school; he has been in this world for over 8 years.

"Man this idiot vampire... he is working me to the bone for the deal I did with him... next time I better read the fine print" he said as he sighed.

He passed by the doors of the high school a guy with purple hair and glasses came to greet him as a red haired boy arrived with him.

"Morning, Issei, Uzumaki" the red haired boy greeted.

"Morning Shirou" they greeted as Naruto scuffled Shirou's hair.

Naruto and Shirou became friends since 8 years ago, thanks to Zelt's intervention he regressed in age again, anyways he and Shirou got pretty close and became like brothers.

Naruto groaned as they went into school it was a rather boring class.

"_Something better happen, else I might just take a page from Archer and become an anti-hero_" Naruto thought annoyed.

He then felt a power spike in the air.

"_What in the world?"_ Naruto thought as he looked towards the skyline and felt a shiver on his back.

"Mr. Uzumaki, do you need to head to the nurses office?" asked the teacher

"eh? Ah no, I am fine, ahahaha!" Naruto said with a nervous chuckle.

**After classes**

"See you tomorrow"

"Bye bye!"

The voices of students interloped each other as they said their goodbyes and headed back home.

"You look like crap Issei, been working hard at the student council?" Naruto asked

"Yeah, but why are you in such a hurry to go home?" Issei said.

"Is because I got dinner dutty" Shirou said

"Ah, so that's why, it seems like **someone**to meet you two" Issei said with a single eye closed.

"meet us both?" Naruto and Shirou said as they looked at each other

"See ya" Issei said as he walked out of the incoming person.

"Naruto-nii! Onii-chan!" a girlish voice said

"Ah!" Naruto grinned a happy smile as Shirou smiled

"Nice to see you Ilya-chan!" Naruto said as she jumped and hanged on his neck with a smile on her.

"Let's go home together!" she said

"Are you going to be ok? What about the bike?" Shirou asked

"Don't worry I am confident in my running" she said as she strolled along with him

"ok then..." Shirou said as he put his foot on his pedal

"Then let's race home Ilya!" Shirou said as he shot out on his bike.

"hahaha! Is nice to see him cut loose like that" Naruto laughed but hen gawked as Ilya shot out like a bullet and caught up

"WAIIIT!" Ilya said as as almost catches Shirou.

"Wha... THAT FAST!" Shirou yelled in shock.

"Only... 54 yards left of running left even if you are a guy... the one who will loose is you" Ilya said

"Don't give up... here you go... tag!" Naruto said as he scooped iliya and put her on his back.

"AND OFF WE GO!" Naruto yelled as he shot out.

"DAH! N... NARUTO! MY... MY SISTER! BE CAREFUL!" he said as he pedaled faster to catch up to them.

"Hyaah! So fast Naruto-nii!" Ilya said as he hair was blown back by the sheer speed.

"last one buys the drinks!" Naruto said as he laughed

"That's not fair!" Shirous panted as he was being left further and further behind.

They arrived to the Einzenberg home

"Yosha! We won!" Naruto said as he stopped on the door as he helped Ilya down.

Shirou arrived as he panted "That's... That's no fair Naruto" Shirou said as he pushed himself.

A lady with long silver hair was carrying the laundry. "Oh? Welcome back Ilya, and Naruto and Shirou together?" Sella asked.

She looked rather beautiful and had an air of elegance.

"Yeah, we meet at the front of the school" Ilya said as she took her hat off

"I am home" Shirou said.

"Thank you for having me in" Naruto said with a smile as he walked in

"Ah, Ilya, come to think of it something came on the mail... it said DVD on it" Sella said

"DVD? Ah!" Ilya said "is here already!" Ilya said as she went to the living room.

Naruto grabbed a glass and put some oolong tea and drank it... "wonder what they are watching" Naruto asked himself.

Then Naruto chuckled as he saw it was a mahou shojo anime (Mahou shojo= Magical girl)

"hmm... good animation" a woman's voice said

"AH! Liz onee-chan! You're already watching it?" Ilya said.

"Oh. Ilya, welcome back" Liz said as she ate a chip.

"Aww! You are having the first viewing by yourself! You're horrible!" Ilya said as she pouted

"Well, it was my money" Liz said

"Hahaha" Naruto chuckled.

"What do you think this is about?" Sella asked

"I think is an anime DVD" Shirou said.

"Ah... Illya has already been tainted by this world... this is all because of my negligence, I can no longer show my face" Sella said

"is just a personal tastes, don't worry about it" Shirou said

"How irresponsible! How can you be her brother with such principles?" Sella yelled

"Eh! Did I say something to make you angry?" Shirou said shocked.

"That you did my friend" Naruto said as he plugged his ears to not hear Sella's yells of outrage.

After dinner and watching a few episodes with Ilya and Liz, they both snuggled at Naruto who was a bit uncomfortable since in this reality Ilya IS a little girl.

"Well thanks for having me I got to head home" Naruto said.

"_Riiight... I am staying around, that power spike got me worried I better hang around"_Naruto thought

And Naruto spend the night on a light pole...

A few hours later Naruto was feeling drowsy and bored... "Why don't cool things happen anymore?" Naruto asked himself and then...

The night sky was lighted up with explosions.

"Oh? What's this?" Naruto said as he looked up... and bleed in his nose at the view.

In the night sky Rin and her friend Luvia where fighting each other with ferocious power.

"Ahh... Rin and Luvia... so good to see them... they seem to be healthy as well in this world... I got to hand it to the old bastard... he knows how to make magical girl costumes" Naruto said with a slight goofy grin.

They started fighting and then out of the sudden they transformed back to their usual selves.

"Oh... this is going to hurt" Naruto winced as the two of them fell from the sky

"The stick must been one of the old bastard's creations... a mystic code of some sort?" Naruto thought

The sticks then shot to the window as Ilya who was looking at the lights.

"Geh! I... ilya?" Naruto said in shock as the stick went in and then...

"Aww crap!" Naruto thought as Ilya turned around and saw Shirou and yelled as she covered herself, the stick then hit Shirou square in the face.

"Hard to think he grew up to become Archer the counter guardian in an alternate reality" Naruto mussed as he snickered.

He then overheard the conversation between Ruby and Ilya and how Ruby managed to fool Ilya into giving a sample of blood, by raising Shirou's towel.

"Great... Ilya is a little ecchi... this will be hilarious" Naruto snickered, then Ilya transformed into her magical girl outfit.

As they were on the back of the house Naruto almost felt his blood run cold when he saw her...

Tohsaka Rin... and she was REALLY pissed off.

"Oh? Who would have thought... Rin survived" the stick said as mentioning something offhandedly.

"Eh- it seems like it doesn't it?" she said with an evil glare as her face tensed and veins popped on her face as she smacked a fist on her hand "Truly life is a wonderful experience"

"Come here Ruby! I'll give you a lesson on who your master is" Rin yelled.

"My master?" Ruby said in a very innocent voice "There's no need for such a lesson, this girl, Ilya. She is my new master" Ruby declared

Naruto was rolling with laughter he wanted to praise the magical stick for being so flippant to the tsundere queen herself.

"HA! WAIT... YOU!" Rin said snarling as she approached Ilya, Naruto took a kunai with a flashbang in case to blind them and rescue Ilya if needed

"This... this is a mistake! A trick I was deceived!" Ilya tried to explain

Rin sighed "Ah... that's enough I get the point" Rin said

"Anyways return the stick, ok?" Rin said, Ilya then stretched the stick to hand it to Rin, however...

"Hmn? What! Don't tell me?" Rin said as she pulled but it wouldn't leave Ilya's hands.

"My... my hand won't let go!" She said as she started sweating bullets.

The wand chuckled "useless, this is useless you two, the master information had already been updated, this person will, body and mind... as long as I don't allow it changing master is impossible!" Ruby stick said proudly.

"DASH!" Rin yelled as she pinned the magical wand deeply into a wall

She then started squeezing it "What a dirty mouth you have there Ruby... I guess I'll just have to FORCE you to change masters" Rin said as she put more power into her grip.

"A passionate response as usual" the wand said

"I love that wand... I should invite it for dinner sometime" Naruto said to himself as he chuckled at the scene unfolding.

The wand then asked Ilya to wave it at Rin

she did so innocently not expecting this…

"TAKE THAT!" Ruby yelled

"GYAAAH!" Rin yelled in pain after being hit with a magical blast.

Kyaah! Som... Something came out!" Ilya said shocked.

"This is Ilya's answer "I won't hand over this stick... Return back to were you came from, old lady with twin tails"" Ruby said

Ilya bleached and Naruto left to laugh his ass off at how fresh the stick was being and praying for the stick to be safe.

"WHAT WAS THAT YOU BASTARD!" Rin yelled as she shot Gandrs at them.

Naruto then threw a couple kunai to deflect the attacks but most of them didn't even hurt Ilya.

The stick explained that it had inherent properties, such as a magical barrier, regeneration, physical shield all at A rank.

"Nice... I am almost the same my magical and physical shields should be around A++ due to Caster's teachings" Naruto said as he remembers Medea rather fondly.

Rin then threw a gem to the air and exploded in a flash of light.

Naruto grinned "I see what you doing there" Naruto said as he licked his lips

Rin appeared next to Ilya and put her finger on her head "Sorry...sleep a little" Rin said as she used a point blank attack and knocked Ilya out.

"If I am going to help I am going to need a disguise... uhmm... maybe I can get something from the mystic box the old bastard gave me.

He opened it and found an outfit that made him smirk "I see... this guy has a warped sense of humor" Naruto said as he pulled an orange cloth.

"Well... can't think of anything better than this... seems I am going to steal your looks... Archer" Naruto said as he put on his clothes on and put on the boots... he grabbed a mask and put it around his head and face.

"All I need is a name... and I shall go by..."

Chapter end

what do you think of this? Should I continue or not?

Also check my DA new pics are up


	2. Chapter 2

Jinchuriki Stay night/KALEID LINER PRISMA ILLYA

A Totally wacked out AU of the FSN universe

Settings are the same as the original the only difference is this is an alternate universe and servants do not exist, there is no Grail or has not been created... Irisviel and Kiritsugu are still alive and made a family independent from the Einzbers thank to a 'someone', an interloper of sorts... how will this change the story? Only me... and, in due time, you as well.

Author's Notes: to the Guest that keeps commenting... I will not write it any sooner with you spamming my other stories, so I urge you to quit it... I will write it when I have inspiration... I will not write it when YOU want it... if you are truly a fan you will wait for it, so once you read it it will be worth it.

Chapter 2: Entering the Ally of chaotic justice.

"Trace...on" a voice called out.

Rin moved back as soon as she heard that sound.

A blade... no, not a blade, a 3 pronged kunai.

"Wha?" Rin was socked.

A flash of orange light, a dark ball was about to hit Ilya.

A gandar shot... it would take a target out my actualizing the 'feeling' of sickness in the body.

A Curse.

Tohsaka was either really angry, not thinking straight... or worst... both of them, at the same time, to use that with a little girl who just became a pseudo 'mahou shojo' of sorts...

Also it didn't help that the Kaleido Stick Ruby was flaming Rin and outright insulting her, that is ALLWAYS detrimental to one's health.

A point blank range Gndar shot, to the point it's a borderline Fin Shot to the head no less... was nothing short of deadly.

And thus he has used the hirashin to 'gently' (read violently) redirect (read shoved trough a few fences and a post) Rin's attack on Ilya.

She barely had time to reinforce herself to take a bit of the damage.

"Aiyaa... what a gentleman to help a lady in distress... hey... who are you buddy?" the Kaleido stick asked.

An evil smirk.

"Urr... wh... no... no way... you are... not... **HIM**... you... I was told you were... you were" Ruby said as she shook her body and wiggled free from Ilya's hand

"Can I have your autograph?! You are the only other person who can out do Zeltrech in making people go insane and in pranks!" Ruby said as she giggled and laughed. A fan of sorts apparently.

"H... HOLD IT RIGHT THERE YOU BASTARD!" a furious voice shouted.

"Aiyaa... she is not dead yet?" Ruby asked.

"Now now... you should be a little polite... this is a Tohsaka after all... of course she would live from that gentle push" the masked person said with a smirk.

Rin looked at him... she couldn't recognize him... there was a 'fog' of sorts that masked his presence, making him 'shift' as in forcing her to see different people who 'could' be this person talking to her, thus making her unable to determine and identify WHO this person was.

It was something he took from Lancelot of the Holy Grail war in another reality... but that's neither here and there.

"Just who are you?" she said as she pulled her gems out.

"Who? Who is but the form following the function of what, and what I am is a man in a mask." he answered with a smirk.

"Yes... I can see that smart ass" She said as a vein bulged on her head.

"Of course you can. I am not questioning your powers of observation, I am simply remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man **Who ** he is" he replied. With a smirk

Tohsaka shivered as she blushed, this guy... was both toying with her... and insulting her.

"She seems out for blood... what to do now?" Ruby asked.

"We... we do nothing... watch this" he said.

"Tohsaka, Rin... Heir of the steemed Tohsaka house, Magus family... weilder of the 5 elements, an 'average one' done a LOT of structural damage, alongside the other exceptional 'average one' Luviagelita Edelfelt, due to both of them being unable to accept an accident and deciding to duke it out and harming a lot of people and, tough unwillingly, destroyed many an important research... both send to Japan to retrieve some 'cards'... seriously... what a joke..." He said

"H... how do you know so much? Answer me or I will **make you**" Rin said as she readied 10 gems

"Aiyaaa~ she has a short fuse that one... doesn't she?" Ruby said

"Not as short as her bust size is at any rate" he said as he chuckled.

short... bust size

bust size... bust size

Short...

Short bust size...

"**YOU ARE DEAD YOU ASSHOLE!**" Rin shouted as she threw the gems at him.

"The old man was right... you really love ticking people off" Ruby said as she was finding this all too amusing.

As the gems flew by Naruto caught each gem and disrupted the prana flow on each one, this was analogous to someone putting the pin back in a grenade that was thrown.

He just vanished and handed the gems back to Rin

"You shouldn't use those... aren't you like... broke right now? Ahh... the Tohsaka's finances are so down... I pity the one you might marry, since you use gems as mystic codes of sorts" Naruto said.

"How about I show you how you SHOULD be fighting?" Naruto said as the wind blew harsher.

*Snk snk snksnk shick*

Rin begun to shiver, not due to fright, she just dind't know why... then she sneesed... she looked at herself

*SPLURT*

He had cut her clothes to tatters.

"I... I AM GOING TO COME BACK FOR YOU... BASTARD! " Rin yelled as she ran away in shame.

"Maybe I over did it?" Naruto said as cracked his neck.

"Achahaa That sure was fun... the old man was right about you... Orange Light" Ruby said as Naruto smirked and pulled down his mask.

"oh... the old blood sucker clued you about my involvement in this?" Naruto asked.

"Ohohoho... old blood sucker is it? But... didn't you sign a Geas with him for something else?" Ruby asked.

Naruto frowned... indeed he did, however he was crafty enough to put some addendum to said geas so no one was overly benefited in it.

"Anyways... weren't two of you made? Where is you sister?" Naruto asked, wanting to change the topic to something less... volatile.

"ah... yes... her, she was helping someone named Luviegalitta or as Rin so lovingly nick named her 'the blue bitch' " Ruby said.

"How is she? I didn't manage to meet your sister, I didn't even know her name... I heard of you by passing... but not from your sis" Naruto asked

"You know, she is the same as me... only more calm and collected" Ruby said

"So... she would be the straight laced younger sister whole you are the wild older sister?" Naruto said

*Stab*

"O... ouch... that was a direct hit" Ruby said as she... cried? Can a stick even cry?

Knowing the old sucker... mayhaps.

"Anyways... I will have to train Ilya now that she is contracted with you... let me guess... you tricked her into holding you... then made her look at something ecchi and thus some blood flew from her nose... said blood is now registered in you as 'owner' of you... am I right so far?" Naruto said as the stick was awestruck.

"H... how did you know!? Down to the last detail even!" Ruby said in sheer shock.

Naruto rose an eyebrow "Cause it's what the old bastard would do"

"Oh? It seems she is coming to... I better go back into character... please remember..." Naruto begun bun Ruby cut him off.

"Yeah I know" she said as Ilya begun to blink.

"Are you alright... Ojou-chan?" Naruto back with his mask said as he smiled at the small girl.

Ilya blushed... he was handsome and dashing... it was something ripped RIGHT out of the mahou shoujo manga.

Ilya blushed... and boy did it show... since she had a near albino skin her face was as red as Rudolph's nose and it glowed even.

"Are you alright?" Naruto reiterated his question.

Ilya shook her head, she nodded in an affirmative manner.

"You just gotten those powers and that ridiculous woman comes over and frightens you... so you are weary... I can see you trying to come with either an escape or delay tactic to run and gather yourself, but I assure you it's completely unnecessary as it would be useless with me here... Ruby, kindly explain to the young lady who I am and what my mission will be" Naruto said as he smiled beneficially.

Ilya flinched, this guy read her like a book.

"There is no need for alarm... I want you to take this" Naruto (in disguise) handed her a small 3 pronged kunai. "If you ever need my help or mentoring I will be there Mahou shoujo-chan" Naruto said as he vanished in a whirlwind of leaves.

Ilya was grabbing Ruby tightly around her chest as she took in all what had happened... she blushed furiously at this... it was just like a romantic tale on her mahou shoujo animes! down to the mysterious and gallant savior.

It has been a long and weird night.

She went inside and powered 'off' and put on her jammies... this night... was WAY too weird.

**Somewhere else in he depths of Germany**

A woman with long white hair and red eyes felt a slight twitch on her skin...

"Are you alright... Iri?" a male voice asked out.

"Uhmm... I am alright honey... here have some coffee... it is rather cold" Iris... Irisviel said.

A man with a black overcoat peering into the distance with a military grade binoculars spying at a mansion at the horizon... it will take a few days to prepare his assault, regardless... he had to succeed... it was all for **her**... his daughter and the safety of his adoptive son.

"However... you don't possess the strength and power to do this assault on your own, now do you?" a new male voice rang out right behind his ear.

The man twisted itself... he let one shot out, the 'person' smiled before he turned into a wooden log.

"Now... is that any way to treat a guest?" the voice said again.

A table with 3 sets of mugs of fine porcelain with coffee, freshly brewed at that.

He pulled a Uzi and shot... only to have all the bullets deflected by a small kunai.

The person rushed up to him.

The man dressed in black... with the dead eyes charged up to the young interloper "Time Accel: Triple Accel"

The young interloper responded in kind...

"Time Accel: Hex Accel"

"W... What?!" the black robed man was shocked... this man... was using HIS magic? The Emiya crest magic of time manipulation!?

Such a thing was supposed to be impossible...

8 kicks 4 punches and a knee to the stomach in less than a blink of an eye... this man... he was a monster... to use more the triple accel... it was akin to near suicide... the blood rushing so fast... tearing your blood vessels...

Yet the black robed man fell perfectly to his chair.

"Now... how about we have a civilized conversation? It won't do if those overly stuffed idiots on the castle begin to wonder what's going on here" the orange clothed man said.

His mask... it was a half mask... letting them see his mouth, he had a shit eating grin on.

Irisviel attacked without hesitation.

Using alchemy she created sturdy and sharp wired that she formed into animals to attack the orange robbed person... however they where restrained by similar wires.

"Ninja wire is very useful... especially if you know how to apply it... you are really something else tough Miss... far more than a simple 'housewife' and mother should" the orange robbed person smirked once more.

Irisviel glared at him.

"Uhmm... you still doubt my intentions... even if we meet before" the orange robbed person said as he sighed.

"Meet... before?" Irisviel said doubting.

He put a hand on his mask and revealed himself.

"Y... you!?" Irisviel was shocked, in front of both was none other than Uzumaki Naruto, highschooler, friend of Shirou and Ilya.

A normal boy for her... however, to be able to use such magecraft and combat abilities.

"Sorry for hidding this, but I did it for the best interests at heart for Ilya" Naruto said as he sat down. "So... Kiritsugu-san, shall we discuss things civilly?" he asked with a grin.

Despite the inclement cold weather they sat down and drank the coffee.

"Alright, I am Uzumaki Naruto, I don't know if your lovely wife has kept you abreast of things but I am Shirou's best friend as well as a friend to Ilya, however I am not originally from this dimension... blame Kaleidoscope for that, I am here because there is something bad going to happen in a few weeks, and Ilya got involved without meaning to, in short she got roped and can't get out... but... I think you knew that... seeing that you still have that 'connection' going on with the greater grail, even if the ritual has all but been dismantled... a portion still remains... the 'lesser grail' is it not?" Naruto said shocking Irisviel and Kiritsugu due to his intensive knowledge.

"In an alternate reality... I was a master in the 5th grail war that would happen around now in this reality... however something is wrong... even if the grail has been dismantled, the lesser grail and the connection to the Throne of Heroes has not... thus this" Naruto said as he put a couple cards of the servants.

"The cards can embed power of the heroic spirits to the wielder, should they be able to use channeling magic, though it can be further simplified by using those two mystic codes from the old blood sucker, which she now has, due to her not being formally trained on her craft... wishcraft I believe... and well I am taking care of training her for what's to come, due to my 'abnormal' contact with magecraft and the like" Naruto said.

"Ab... normal?" Irisviel asked.

"Originally I was a shinobi from another reality that had no magecraft or prana, rather we used our physical and spiritual energy to form what is known as chakra... due to a large scale fight with an enemy shonobi/goddess... or whatever... I was thrown half dead into another reality, my body merged with someone you are most familiar with Kiritsugu-san" Naruto said with a smile.

"You... you don't mean..."

"Yes... I became who was once Emiya Shirou... tough I retained my memories and he became more of a passenger in his own body... you taught me some basic magecraft to become 'a hero of justice'... I couldn't use my own chakra so learning magecraft was all I could do to protect and save people... in a way... you are my second father, after all... I managed to do so... I protected my precious people... and even if you passed on, I made sure I tied up all loose ends, the Ilya in the reality I landed, was used as a weapon to get the grail... but I put those idiots on their place once I dismantled the whole ritual... old man Acht was... eliminated... with extreme prejudice" he said with a smile that spoke of fondness upon remembering that particular memory.

"I... I see..." Kiritsugu took the information in.

"Don't worry... Ilya in my home reality is safe and sound, I managed to get someone who fixed her life span and now can even be like you Irisviel... or should I call you Okasan too?" Naruto said with a grin.

Irisviel blinked.

"another one? I woudln't mind... and I so do love children" she said.

"Uhmm... but... isn't Stella and Leysritt who do all the house-chores, the cooking the the other stuff?" Kiritsugu asked.

Irisviel dropped down in defeat... you could literally see an arrow on her that read "Reality"

"Comedic aside... shall we begin?" Naruto handed a remote to Kiritsugu

"You know what to do" he said

With a smirk... Kiritsugu pressed the red button.

**Einzbern Castle 5 minutes ago**

Old man Acht had a bad feeling, like a cold feeling crawling up his spine, he was really old, and his magecraft was something else... the only thing he had done and regretted was the hiring of Kiristsugu, because of him his dream of finally getting his family long lost sorcery was forever lost.

And the worst was the Irisviel managed to attain human emotions, not only that but had conceived a child, and both sneaked away from him.

That sorcery... the second magic Heaven's Feel was now forever lost to the ages.

He took one last look at the moon... so close... so close to call that person back... to restore the former glory of the Einzbern house.

He felt a small tremor... but didn't pay too much attention.

Then those tremors intensified.

The castle was under attack... but who? Not even Kiritsugu could be so brazen to do this...

A single person was walking trough the dibris.

"Indeed old man Acht... he was not working alone... he had a 'little' help" a voice said from inside the hellish flames. A man wearing an orange coat that blended with the flames... blond hair and azure eyes.

He then... teleported... glided? There was no words for his movements... but in a blink of the eye he was right in front of the old man, all his magical defenses shattered like wet tissue paper.

"The documentation on homunculus... where is it?" Naruto asked.

The old man smirked... "Why on earth would I tell you that?"

"Is ok... I don't need you to tell me anything... I will brute force my way into your info" Naruto said as his eyes shifted.

No longer his eyes where azure, they where purple with ripples on them.

"Well... at least Kiritsugu will believe you died in the explosion" Naruto said as he placed his hand on Acht's head.

"W...WHAT!?" Acht said as he literally saw the youth ripping the ghost out of him.

"_This... this is a bastardized version of our sorcery... how... how is this possible?!_" Acht tough as he took in his last breath.

"I see... so this way the way to give them longevity... and the grail's working, this could come in handy later on... I see... well old man... you can 'die' here... of course, you are already dead" Naruto said as he let go of Acht's dead body.

Not a second later the place went up like the 4th of July... the castle laid in ruins... the combat homoculus laid in waste... broken like the dolls they were.

"Naruto-kun... where did you go?" Irisviel asked.

"Me? Here, there... no where, everywhere... hey don't look at me like that... with kaleidoscope I can pretty much back up that claim" Naruto said. "By the way... Kiritsugu, you really ought to see your kids more, they will forget how you look like due to all the time you spend out doing your 'missions', relax and learn how to be a dad too... those 2 homunculus would appreciate some of the workload off them ya know?" Naruto said to Kiritsugu.

"By the by... you may want this... it's not good to have your heart so exposed after all" Naruto said as he handed a vial to Kiritsugu.

"Bone...regenerator?" Kiritsigu read the Russian letters on the vial.

"it should help with those pesky problems you have in the ribs... or due to the lack of them" Naruto said

"That... that is true... but... a man like me... has..." Kiritsugu said.

"Do you want me to beat some sense into you?" Naruto said as he let a bit of his killing intent flood out.

"ah...no... I... I understand" Kiritsugu said as he backed away from the young boy.

"You might have been my father in an alternate reality but if you act like an idiot I will make you see your errors with some tough love" Naruto said as he laughed heartily.

Kiritsugu was swallowed up by this guy's peace.

"Anyways... I need to get back now... also... you 2 need to keep appearances... and hide who I am from Ilya and Shirou..." Naruto said.

"Wait... before you go... Shirou... in that reality you come from... what happened to him?" Kiritsugu asked.

He was afraid... that his ideal had made the young impressionable boy die for it.

"While he is an idiot... he is a strong idiot... he became a hero... he became an heroic spirit afterward" Naruto said with a smile... I should know... I fought him in the 5th grail war... he was a tenacious and strong bastard" he said with a smirk "_Archer you bastard asshole"_

"I... I see" Kiritsugu was shocked.For someone to become a heroic spirit in this age and time must have done some profound things.

"Anyways... take care... I will see you in a couple of weeks since that's what it will take you to get back... good bye" Naruto said as he vanished in a multicolored light.

"Seems like things are gonna get hectic" Kiritsugu said.

"Yes... but isn't it cute... we have another one to our growing family" Irisviel said with a smile.

"You just love picking up strays no?" Kiritsugu said as he chuckled... he took a drag from his cigarette and threw it away.

They left towards the car... it was time to leave this god forsaken place where bad memories resided in it.

**Fuyuki city Einzbern home**

"YAWWWWWWWWWWN" a young, white/silver haired girl woke up groggily... it was 7 AM... she had to get ready for school... Ilya looked in front of her... yes... the annoying floating scepter thing was right in front of her... it wasn't a dream, she really did became a mahou shoujo... however one question remained... would it be like the 'regular' mahou shoujo manga/anime sterotype? Or would she end up like puella magi madoka?

She shivered at the though... she saw that with one of the maids once... she had gotten 'indisposed' after witnessing the viceral horror.

"Ilya... the bathroom is ready you can use it now" a male's voice sounded.

It was her older (adoptive) brother/crush Shirou.

He was with his boxers and without a shirt... his body was glistenign on Ilya's eyes, she became red.

"Ilya?! Are... are you ok?" he asked

Ilya nodded vigorously... she went in and slammed the door... and promptly doused herself with cold water.

Still... that guy that saved her...

"He was kinda cute... is what you are thinking... aren't ya?" Ruby said as she floated about.

This time, she had taken a compact form, quite literally.

She looked like a compact powdering kit for little girls... the perfect disguise... also overused for mahou shoujo.

After showering and drying she went to her school... he had been warned by her savior on NOT spilling the beans on her newfound abilities... due to the regulation on magic as well as people WANTING to keep magic a secret, so magic would retain their mystery (as mystery equated to power, meaning the more people knew, the less powerful it became)

Her ability was a tad different... but her didn't go into detail... needles to say he was going to see her growth and help her develop her abilities and powers.

"_Kinda like prince End*mion on Sailor M**n" she thought dreamily._

Ruby chuckled...this girl would be fun to tease and play around with.

**At School**

"Hello everyone... we have an special announcement" the female teacher, Fujimura Taiga said with a smile "We have a new person coming in with us... go on... introduce yourself" she said as she gently shoved the new kid in.

"Hello... my name is Namikaze Minato, please take care of me" he said with a slight bow and a megawat grin.

In truth, the small kid was Naruto in henge... his hair was red like his mother's and his eyes stayed the same... it also changed the length and shape of it... basically he was like a male version of his mother.

"_This is gonna be one boring life... I just know it_" Naruto thought.

All in all this would be an interesting 'life' if at bit boring at times.

Chapter end


End file.
